Anger. Sadness. Fear. Sometimes, it is difficult to sort through those emotions. Channeling our mind to a point where we can change our mindset to change the outcome can be easier said than done.
Lingering pain in all of us can feel like anger at times, though it is typically the shadow cast by other emotions and fears that triggers a sense of sadness.
A brave, strong, and confident woman I had the pleasure to meet addressed these feelings in her movement, The Jesse Lewis Choose Love movement. Her goal is to promote social-emotional learning around the world to help children (and all of us, really) chose love over fear and anger.
I thought of her beautiful message and mission tonight in the way that anger typically breeds something else under the surface. Is it fear? worry? confusion? frustration? disappointment? It is clear that we need to correct the underlying issue in order to choose love effectively.
Tonight I found a true struggle to find balance and deal with the underlying issue when I saw my child choose anger.
As I witnessed the pain inside my child, I could not help but feel a small bit of anger coupled with a large dose of disappointment. I was not disappointed for the emotions or feelings that surfaced, but rather that I was unable to help the child choose love and deal with the worry and frustration. I could not help channel it with positive energy. I felt lost and uncertain.
Anger emerged on a random Tuesday afternoon and lingered with a bit of rage. It is unsettling to know that a child is unable to conceptualize and deal with the emotions behind a rare disease and the effect it subtlety takes on a family daily, but forcefully overtakes on others.
Tonight was a defeat in an emotional strife. The battle is far from over.
We worked to draw, talk, and channel energy through physical activity to choose love and work through pain.
Our basic need to feel supported and loved can surface when we least expect them to and some nights it must be a conscious decision to choose love and lead your family with love.
The more we model our courage to choose love and work through our emotions, the stronger our future generations will be.
Tonight I lacked complete awareness on how to best do so, but I will never stop trying.